Thankful in the Storms

I got up this morning with the intention to mow the back yard (at my grandparents' house... we've been housesitting for them for a week but they're coming home today!).  Then, when we were finishing breakfast, I heard thunder.  It's stormed nearly every morning for the last week!

I have Pandora on (it's kind of become an obsession... I love all the fun/inspiring music playing while I'm writing at home or working at the library), and a little while ago the song "Praise You in the Storm" came on. My life isn't really a "storm" right now, but it just made me smile because of the thunderstorm that was going on at the time.  (It's since quit... now I have no excuse to not go mow the lawn!)

The point is, it was little reminder that I can always be thankful, even when it might not make sense (thank you, God, for [insert really difficult thing here]).  It's been easy to be thankful for a lot of things-- the fact that my grandparents basically let us eat whatever we wanted out of the fridge and freezer, so I didn't have to buy groceries this week.  The wonderful friends and fantastic coworkers I have.  Time to rest and relax with my husband in the evenings.  The opportunity to witness and enjoy an incredibly beautiful wedding last weekend.

But I know that life isn't always made up of things for which it's easy to say "thank you."  We experience loss.  Grief.  Depression.  Financial difficulty.  The day-to-day stress which, when it piles up, seems too much to bear.  The sick child.  The loss of a job.  The death of a parent.  The move of a dear friend.

In those times, it's hard to be thankful.  I've had experiences of my own when I wondered, what good can possibly come from this?

Sometimes I've seen the good that has come from those times.  A lot of the time I don't... but I know that God always brings good even out of the worst things.  He promises that he will, so I can trust that.

It's not easy to trust in that, but that's why faith is a gift from God, not something I can produce on my own.

If you're in a valley right now, I just want you to know that God is there, too.  He has a plan--even if you don't know what it is--and he will bring about blessing through those trials, whether for you or someone else.

Evil has already lost in this world: Satan has been vanquished and Jesus has conquered.  Even the most horrible things are temporary.  Christ has died and risen, and is in heaven waiting to bring us to be with him in paradise for eternity.

When I can't see the good that could come from a situation, that's why I take comfort in: knowing that it's temporary, and ultimately, I have victory in Jesus.

I pray that you are encouraged by that knowledge today!

(P.S. The song that's playing now?  "Grace Like Rain.")

Linking today with: The Fontenot Four, black tag diaries, Uplifting Love, There's Just One Mommy, Graced Simplicity

Redeemed

Redeemed: bought back, exchanged, purchased, reclaimed, ransomed.

I have been redeemed.  I would be a slave to sin and Satan if Jesus had not paid the price for me.

Had he not given his life for mine, I would have had to pay for my sin with my own eternal soul.  I would have spent eternity in hell.  But Jesus paid the life-debt for me and all other people.  He took the guilt of our sin on himself and gave up his life as a ransom for us all.

Thus, I am free.  Saved.  Redeemed.  And so are you.

I am no longer bound to sin; now, because Christ is my Redeemer, I am bound to him.  I am one with him through my baptism, and my life belongs to Christ--to God-- because he made me.  In response to what he has done for me, I strive to love and serve him by loving and serving others.  I can't do this perfectly--I fail all the time--but he already took care of the guilt of my sins, including the failure to love and obey him fully, and even the sins I haven't committed yet.

I don't have to live in fear of punishment.  Jesus already took the punishment that I deserve.  He destroyed the power of Satan, death and hell.  They no longer hold power over me, or over you.  Satan still has power in this world, but the battle is over--he has already lost, and he knows it.  Those who believe in Jesus will spend eternity with him in heaven, no matter what Satan tries to do to them in this world.  Why?  Because we belong to Jesus, and he is more powerful even than Satan.

We can therefore live this life in joy.  We are free from the weight of our own sin, and from the weight of the sin of the world.  Jesus bore it for us.  Despite the evil that is still rampant all around us, our life doesn't have to be one of sadness or despair.  Not for us.  Not for those who are children of God.  We have the promise of eternal life, and we know that nothing can separate us from God's love--because he has redeemed and saved us.

I know that my Redeemer lives!
What comfort this sweet sentence gives.
He lives, he lives, who once was dead--
He lives, my ever-living Head.

He lives triumphant from the grave,
He lives eternally to save.
He lives all glorious in the sky,
He lives exalted there on high.

He lives and grants me daily breath.
He lives, and I shall conquer death.
He lives my mansion to prepare--
He lives to bring me safely there.

(I Know that My Redeemer Lives, vv 1, 3, 7; text by Samuel Medley.)

Marriage--More than I Expected

I got married at the tender age of 19-not-quite-20.  I don't regret it one bit--my husband and I are growing up together, get to spend tons of time together, get to learn and experience life together, and will have several married years before we start having children.  Marrying my man when I did is the best decision I ever made.

But I'll be the first to admit that I really had no idea what I was getting myself into when I got married!  Marriage has brought a lot of surprises--some pleasant, some not as much.

I didn't expect that marriage would force me to mature so quickly.  In the last almost-two years, I've had to learn to really be an adult.  I've had to learn how to be selfless (that's a work in progress).  I've had to learn how to handle finances, jobs, taxes, car repairs, medical issues, and more.  I have learned to release myself from childhood and from the mindset of being dependent on my parents.  Now, my husband and I take care of each other.  I knew, cognitively, that all those things would come with marriage, but I didn't realize how quickly I (and my husband) would grow up.

I didn't expect how hard marriage would be.  It's so worth it, but it's not always easy.

It's harder than I expected to come up with new date night ideas so we don't fall into the rut of "same ol', same ol'."  To keep the house clean, orderly, and comfortable, day in and day out.  To keep up with the never-ending jobs of laundry and dishes and scrubbing the toilet.  To plan healthy, yummy meals...three times a day, every day (although this job comes more easily to me than others).  I didn't expect it to take so much work to die to myself every day and intentionally love my husband the way he needs to be loved, not the way I want to be loved.  To bite my tongue instead of letting an angry word slip past my lips when my temper flares.  It's a lot more work than I expected.

But there are other things about marriage that are more than I expected.  Amazing, wonderful things!

This love that comes out of my heart, directed at this person with whom I share, literally everything,  is beyond anything I have ever experienced or could ever imagine.  I never knew it was possible to love someone so much... or, just as wondrous, to be loved by them so much.  Now I know why God uses the example of marriage to explain to us how much he loves us.  It's a love that surpasses description, and cannot be expressed in words.

Marriage is more full of joy than I expected.  You know the old adage about how two people can halve each other's sorrows and double each other's joys?  Well, in marriage, that is SO true.  Happy things are twice as happy.  Hard things are twice as easy to bear.  I mean, I get to spend the majority of my time with my best friend, who happens to be a really fun person to spend time with, who makes me laugh, who puts a lot of effort into making me happy, who directs me to my Jesus, and who loves me more than I will ever understand (as explained above).  How much better can life get?

In marriage, there is more laughter than I expected.  There is more encouragement.  I didn't realize how much of a team we would be.  We're each other's "buddies"--we always have the other's back, and we might sometimes get on each other's nerves, but just let someone else say something mean about us and watch out!  We're there for each other.  And let's just say... there are other aspects of marriage that have far surpassed my expectations, and I couldn't be more thrilled!

Marriage is so much more work than I expected...and sometimes, it brings pain, because we can hurt the most the ones we love the most.
But those hard things are so worth it, because in marriage, the love, joy, and happiness are so much more than I expected.  I am in awe of this gift with which God has blessed us.

And I can't wait to see what other unexpected things life brings our marriage.  The future isn't scary, because God is already there, leading us on, and I know that my husband and I will be hand-in-hand every step of the way.

What in your life has been more than you expected?  Share in the comments!

Linking with: Exceptionalistic, A Proverbs 31 Wife, What Joy is Mine, The Alabaster Jar, The Modest Mom, Yes They're All Ours, The Better Mom, To Love, Honor and Vacuum, Messy Marriage, Graced Simplicity

J is for... {Thankful Thursday}

I like the letter "J."  Not just because it's my first initial, but because it's the first letter of the names of the two people who love me most--

Jesus and Joshua.

One of them died and rose again so I could have life.
The other one promised his life to me.

Both love me more than I can comprehend, far more than I deserve, and more than I could repay...
but that's what makes it real love.

And because of the love from both of them, I have another gift for which I'm thankful--

Joy.

It is the love of God, and the love of my husband, which give me the greatest joy I think it's possible to experience (at least on this earth!).

I'm thankful for justification--the result of Jesus' sacrifice for me on the cross.  I have been justified before God.  Now it's "just as if I'd" never sinned--before God I am holy and sinless!

And I am thankful for the journey of life that I get to travel with my darling husband.  There's no one else I'd rather be beside for my whole life.  He is my best friend, my lover, and my greatest encouragement.

And I'm thankful that I'm Jaimie.  I'm happy to be me--just the way God made me. :)


What are you thankful for?  Anything that begins with "J"?

Linking today with The Fontenot Four and black tag diaries.

The Antidote to Worry, the Source of Peace

I struggle with worry.

If you have read my scribblings around here for long enough, you know that.  God's constantly trying to teach me how to trust, despite my circumstances.

I had another lesson in trust yesterday, partially due to my mother.  My mother, who has been blessed by this woman, dear Ann, and who in turn has been able to bless others.  My mother, who said once,

Thankfulness is the antidote to worry--

the source of peace.

Copyright (c) 123RF Stock Photos

Yesterday I was reading Ann's words in her amazing book, One Thousand Gifts.  
I realized, once again, how my fear of the future can be conquered.  How my worry about the unknown can be vanquished.

Thankfulness.

How does this work?  Well, like everything, it starts with God.

God, who loves us so much that He has given us everything-- from the food in our refrigerators to the incredible forgiveness won for us by His Son on the cross.

God blesses us.  He promises in His Word that He will always bless us.  He will always make sure we have everything we need (see Matthew 6).

We look around us, and see those blessings, and count them.  (I sporadically keep a gratitude journal... working on making this a daily habit, and I highly recommend it.)  When we recognize those blessings, and thank God for them, we are reminded of His faithfulness.

We are reminded that He ALWAYS keeps His promises.

That means He will continue to bless us.  When we look toward the future, we can know, with absolute certainty, that God will provide for us there as He has in the past.

Then we can kick that fear out of our hearts.  That worry about the future?  It has no place in my life.  God's got the future in His hands.  That fear of the unknown?  God knows everything.  He has seen what I needed in the past and provided for it.  He knows what I need for the future.

How does thankfulness become the source of peace?
When we realize that as God has blessed us, so He will continue to bless us.  We can count on Him.

We can trust Him entirely.  He has fulfilled the promises He made in the past-- we KNOW he will fulfill the promises He's made for the future.  We can have absolute faith in that fact.

This kind of faith brings joy, joy that isn't dependent on circumstances.
It brings peace--peace that passes understanding, because it is a peace that comes from the Holy Spirit in our hearts.  Not a peace the world can understand.  Peace that God alone gives.

Just like He gives everything else.

God's blessings lead to our thankfulness for those blessings.  Our thankfulness leads to the strengthening of our trust in Him, because we can count on Him to continue to bless us.  Our trust leads to peace and joy, because we have nothing to fear in this life.  Nothing at all.

Blessings.
Thankfulness.
Trust.
Peace.
Joy.

All gifts from God... all starting with the amazing love He has for us.


Linking today with: The Fontenot Four, black tag diaries, Loved and Lovely, lovely little whimsy, There's Just One Mommy, Our Simple Country Life, Raising Mighty Arrows

It's still Thursday, and I'm still thankful

Oh, so thankful, for so many things!

(This is my four hundredth post!!)

My beloved friend Ruth spent the last five days with us.  We ate good food, worshiped together, laughed together, spent lots of time talking (and staying up late) and reconnected like it had been six days instead of six months since we'd been together.  She is an incredible gift from God.

Lord willing, we'll visit Ruth and her husband over spring break.  I am so thankful for friends like them (and Sara, who has also been such a blessing to me lately--as always)!!

I am thankful for the ways God makes His word and will abundantly clear to me.  Like this week, I heard Romans 8 three days in a row.  And I heard this message, over and over, just in slightly different words--God using His people to speak to me:

"Life won't always be easy.  Just because you believe in Me doesn't mean things will always work out the way you want them to.  But My will will always be done, and I always have your best interests in mind.  I love you, and you have a lot of friends and family who love you, too.  I will bless you in ways you would never have imagined.  I will always take care of and provide for you.  Simply trust Me in all things--you have nothing to worry about or fear.  You are My child, little one, and that means you are always in My care."

My darling husband--who has such a servant's heart--cleaned out the massive (and disgusting) clog in our kitchen sink this past week, and fixed the drippy pipe.  I never realized how much I generally take my kitchen sink for granted, of all things, but I learned how much I should appreciate it when I had to do dishes in the bathroom!

Every semester I have classes that get me so excited to learn.  This semester, I'm excited about all of them!  I have English, theology, history and science classes, and (as mentioned in a previous post) I'm taking volleyball and soccer.  By the end of this semester I'll be done with my general education (yes, after four years).  I like and greatly respect all of my professors, and I know this is going to be a great semester.

I am so thankful for our home, and even the never-ending responsibility of keeping it clean and in order.  We have such a lovely place to live, which I appreciate all the more since Joshua rearranged last weekend--it's fun to have a "new" space in which to live.

This week has been so bitterly cold, which has made me all the more thankful for our car!  Especially with having Ruth here, it has been wonderful to have our own transportation.  I am, however, looking forward to warmer temperatures and walking/biking weather again!

I'm also thankful for new followers here and new friends on Facebook!  If you're new here, please comment and introduce yourself--I can't wait to get to know you!

"Be joyful always," Paul wrote, "pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18)  This is my prayer for me, and for you, today and always.


Linking up with:
black tag diaries, The Fontenot Four, There's Just One Mommy, Lovely Little Whimsy, Loved and Lovely

Born to die...and live

I find myself smiling every time I'm able to say "Merry Christmas" to someone in a store, or at work.  It's a reminder of what this holy day we're soon to celebrate is all about.  Signs and decorations proclaiming "Jesus is the reason for the season!" are great--and I agree with them--but do we ever stop to think about why Jesus came to earth?

God became flesh, taking the form of a human baby, so he could live as one of us...and die.

Jesus was born to die.

That was the goal of his life: to give it up in order to save ours.  To draw all people to himself.  To conquer sin, death, and the devil once and for all.

That baby lying in a manger, born in a humble stable, coming into the world naked and bawling?  Just about thirty-three years later, he would be humbled in another way--nailed, naked, to a rough wooden cross, hung high for all those around to see.  He would give up himself willingly--and Satan would think he had won.

But then, three days later, he would rise again.  His body would be whole and perfect.  And those who loved him proclaimed the news joyfully--He is risen!  Just as the angels had proclaimed to the shepherds--He is born!

Humbled, in order to be glorified.

Born, to die...and then live.

God made man, so that man could live eternally with God.

Emmanuel...God with us. 

That, my friends, is the reason for this holy season.  That is what Christmas is all about.

living in Advent

Some days I forget it's Advent.

Not just the days leading up till Christmas...but we're living in Advent all the time, people!  We're waiting, preparing (that's what "Advent" means), for the second coming of Jesus Christ, whose first coming to earth we'll celebrate in just twelve days.

We're waiting for the Son of God to come back--God, who became human, one of us--in order to live, die, and rise again--for us.

This Son of God, who loves us so very much, is coming back for us.

Even as we anticipate the joy of Christmas, we see so much sadness in the world.  War, hunger, poverty, homelessness, disease, crime, anger, hate... all the signs that sin saturates this planet.  It might be easy to forget about some of those things for a while, when we're in our warm homes, brightened by colored Christmas lights, eating lots of special food and treats, spending our over-abundance of money on gifts (many of which aren't really necessary), and wishing each other the peace and joy of the season.

Don't get me wrong, those are all good things and I enjoy them so much!  But we like to forget all those bad things that are happening, that don't affect our lives.  But those things are part of our world, too.  They're caused by our own sinfulness.  But Christ came to this sinful world anyway...isn't that amazing?

It's important to remember that these things won't last.  All those horrible, sad, depressing things?  They're temporary.  Our houses, our possessions, our jobs, our wealth (or lack thereof) aren't permanent.

The peace and joy that our Savior brings, though--that will last.

Soon the reign of sin in the world will end.  It may not be in our lifetime, but it will not last forever.

I'm fairly certain it won't end on December 21st.  God is returning, but not when we expect Him to.  We can't foretell when that Day will come--not even the Son knows that, but only the Father.

But it is coming!  The Savior who has come into the world, will come back--to take me, and all believers, to live in paradise with him, for eternity.

It'll be like a never-ending Christmas celebration: surrounded by our loved ones, in the light of His presence, praising God and basking in His love.  Forever.

Are you ready?

When God Interferes in My Life

Today's Joy Dare:
A gift that made you pray, a gift that made you laugh, a gift that made you quiet.

I prayed when I heard the sirens signaling an emergency.  Thankful for those whose job it is to come to the rescue.

I laughed when, helping a fellow student in the library, difficulty in finding a book meant we spent half an hour chatting and getting to know each other.  And I had never seen her before!  God works in wonderful ways!

I was quiet listening to our friend Joseph talk, explaining how we communicate, how Joshua and I can communicate better, how I can be a better wife to my husband.  And I was quiet hugging Ruth goodbye (just till Sunday), realizing fully how much her friendship has come to mean to me.

I love how God uses gifts like these, to trigger emotional and spiritual responses and to tell and teach me things.  When he wants me to think of him, to speak to him, he uses various circumstances to get my attention.  When he wants me to know he's watching out for me, that he loves me, he puts people in my path to remind me of that.  When he wants to teach me something, he puts words in the mouths of those around me to tell me what I need to hear.

Often when I'm sad God will bless me with a gorgeous sunset, a rainbow in a cloudy sky, a hug from a friend, a note in the mail, or something else to cheer me up and remind me of his love.

When I'm angry and not handling it well he'll put a thought in my head or words on a page (like a Bible verse in my school planner that I noticed the other day when I was upset) to bring my sin to my attention and draw me to repentance.

Sometimes when I feel alone or am missing someone, God will place me in the path of just the right person to make me feel loved and remind me that I'm never alone.

And when I'm joyful, I sometimes feel a greater joy when I realize that HE is the source of my happiness.  When I recognize him as the Giver of all things.

Seeing Joy

Every day I see the work of Satan around me:
Worry.  Fear.  Anger.  Discontentment.  Gossip.  Maliciousness.  Meanness.  Sadness.  Grief.
Sometimes it seems like those things are the only things people feel and do and think.  Like Satan's taking over the world.

In some ways, he has.  God's given him some temporary, limited control over the earth--just for now.  But God is still at work.  His Holy Spirit is still active and changing lives and hearts.  Jesus' sacrifice was all that was needed for the salvation of the whole world, once for all, and it has not nor will it ever be nullified.

The Gospel changes hearts.  What Christ did for us on the cross took away the power of Satan in our lives.  Sure, he still has ways of affecting our lives.  Sin is still a big part of the world, and it's still part of every person, including believers.
But knowing what we know about what God has done for us changes everything.  Having an eternal perspective on life means that we don't have to despair.  The things that define who Satan is don't have to define us.

In Christ, by the power of the Holy Spirit in our hearts and lives, we can know love.  Peace.  Contentment.  Kindness.  Goodness.  Gentleness.  Selflessness.  Comfort.  Happiness.  Joy.


Ann's Joy Dare for today asks for "3 ways you witnessed happiness today."

I witnessed happiness in a four-year-old holding her daddy's hand.
In a good-looking, head-over-heels-for-each-other couple hand in hand.
In my friend eating bread that I made yesterday.

And I experienced happiness myself:

In a hug from my husband.
Nearly two hours to read a good book undisturbed.
Several compliments on my outfit today.
Singing in choir beside a lovely friend.

So yes, Satan still has an influence on my life.  But God has a bigger one.  He's the one who has taken over my heart.  He has "turned my mourning into dancing."  The hope I have in eternal life means that this life can be one of joy.

The Habit of Joy

I'm trying some new things this year.

One of them is starting a gratitude journal: I'm going to write out my One Thousand Gifts this year.  And I started today, in a beautiful new journal from a friend.

Something else I'm doing in relation to that is the Joy Dare from Ann Voskamp, writer of One Thousand Gifts.  As an encouragement, a challenge, Ann has a list (the Joy Dare link above) of blessings to look for each day.  I'm going to challenge myself to do this and to blog every day about that day's blessings, as well as recording at least five blessings a day in my gratitude journal.  I'm also going to start reading Ann's book.

Today, January 6, Epiphany: "One thing in your bag, your fridge, your heart."

I haven't been using a purse or a backpack much in the last couple of weeks.  But starting Monday I'll be hoisting my red backpack again, full of books, notebooks, a sack lunch.  Those notebooks: places to record what I'm learning.  What I'm being taught.  What God is showing me.

My fridge: is full, thanks to a recent grocery shopping.  One thing in there that I especially love is those little clementine oranges, the "Cuties."  They're so sweet, so juicy, so fun to eat!  And I get them all to myself because Hubby doesn't like oranges. ;)

My heart: is convicted.  Is reassured.  Convicted that I need to trust.  Reassured that I don't have to do it alone.  Reassured that I will be taken care of, provided for, blessed--by the One who loves me more than I can imagine, and by my husband, who also relies on the Creator for all things.


I'm excited to develop these habits of thankfulness and joyfulness--and writing. :)

Blessings this Thursday

Lipstick on the edge of the cup that held a "Caramel Royal" (aka a Caramel Machiatto!).

Reading my story, aloud, to a whole class.  Encouragement from our professor.

A poetry presentation.  Feeling confident and prepared in front of the room.  Insights from classmates that I never would have thought of.

Laughter at the beginning of philosophy: grammar-related.  A funny email that the professor shared with us. :)

Sitting downstairs (instead of in the balcony) with a beloved teacher for chapel.

Unexpected income from babysitting.

A blustery, leaves-in-the-air autumn day.

Rain and sunshine, chill and warmth, clouds and blue skies, all in the same day.

The joy and singing of a four-year-old.

Sandwiches and chocolate for lunch (thanks to my awesome hubby).

Ten extra hours of work this week: extra income.  Financial breather.

Good health.  Healing hubby.

My husband suggested that I get a new dress for the homecoming dance.  I'm going "thrifting" with a friend to get it. :) <3

Work.  An education.

Home.  Bed.  Kitchen.


So many more...so many gifts.  All is grace.



linking up to black tag diaries for Thankful Thursday!

Thankful Thursday

Linking up with black tag diaries today!

Today I am thankful for:

~Chai tea and homemade toast for breakfast

~Encouragement and critiquing among friends and classmates

~The incredibly inspiring poetry of high-school girls

~A four-year-old who never fails to bring joy to my heart

~An amazing lunch hour at home with my husband :)

~A squirrel dashing through our modern poetry class (which was meeting outside)

~The gorgeous weather!

~A kind and generous school newspaper editor

~Encouragement and laughter from friends and coworkers on a busy night

~An hour in the library, visiting with a friend while we got paid to sit at the circulation desk

~The knowledge that tomorrow is Friday

~God's constant grace, providence, love, mercy, forgiveness...

I'm Glad to Be Me

I'm thankful for the person I am and for the body God put me in, but I tend to put myself down a lot and have been discontent with myself--my hair, my maturity and responsibility or lack thereof, my skills or lack of them.

My husband is good at encouraging me and making me feel better about myself.  That helps.

I've also realized that putting myself down and not being content with myself, the way I am, is really putting God down and not being content with the way he made me to be.

David wrote in the Psalms that we are "fearfully and wonderfully made."

My Sunday school teacher used to say that "God don't make junk."

Two of our best friends, Ruth and Joe (they're married) told me yesterday that they think my hair is beautiful when it's down in all its wavy, sometimes-frizzy (I think) glory, something Joshua says all the time.  And today Joe, who has known me for two years now, said he's enjoyed watching me grow up and mature in that time.

It's one thing for my parents to say I'm beautiful and they're proud of me.  I know they mean it, and I take them at their word.  But they're a little biased. :)

It's nice to be reminded of my own worth: which comes not from my own self and accomplishments but comes from the single fact that I am a created child of God.

GOD MADE ME.

He also lived, died, rose and lives again for me.  For me.  Me, Jaimie, with all my failures and mistakes and sorrows and flaws and sins.  With all my successes and joys and talents: all gifts from God.

The God who made me.
I'm glad I'm me.

Peacefulness and Thankfulness

All I hear is the gentle ticking of the clock.  It's a constant reminder of the one in my parents' living room: if I were to close my eyes, I could imagine myself there.

It's almost completely silent besides the clock this morning.  9:30 on a Sunday, I'm up, my husband is still asleep on the other side of the wall.  Curiously, I notice that I'm filled with an inner peace.  I've felt it before, but not for a while, or at least I haven't been aware of it for some time.  There's no worrying, no frustration, no distress.


Thank you God.

I'm content with my life, with who I am, with the way things are.  The silence makes me peaceful, too.  I know there are dishes in the sink and church clothes to decide on, but that's okay.  There's no rush this morning.

It's nice, this feeling that everything is all right with the world.  I don't always feel this way.  Sometimes the worry takes over, my imagination running wild with "what if"s.  And I destroy my own inner peace.  I know why.  It's because I try to figure everything out for myself, by myself.  I don't always have to understand the why's or how's.  This contentment that I feel?  It's a "peace that surpasses understanding."  The Holy Spirit doesn't think like I do.  He doesn't let worry get in his way.  He has the ability to snuff anxiety out like a tiny candle, and replace it with this gentle, comfortable, relaxing feeling--my breathing is even and slow, my features are relaxed, my stomach is knot-less, and no unhappy thought is filling my head.

This is what happens when I let God take control of my life.  Trying to do it myself never really works.  God's much better at handling my life than I am.  If only I could remember that all the time: give in to this sweet surrender, let Him take care of everything, every day.

Every morning could feel like this, with the Spirit filling my home and my heart.

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." -Philippians 4:6-7

"Your beauty...should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth to God." -1 Peter 3:3a & 4

Back to Work!

Tonight I went back to working at the school cafeteria.  As weird as it sounds, I was thrilled.  For a couple reasons.  One, I'm able to now contribute more to the family income.  Two, I love serving and feeding people.  Three, I was really excited to see friends from school again.  This summer has been wonderful, but I haven't had many friends in town.  Now they're all back, and I couldn't be happier!!

I think God put in all people a desire to work, and a sense of satisfaction from a job, any job, well done.  Yeah, making sandwiches for people and then sweeping a cafeteria floor isn't a very glamorous job.  But hey, I'm helping fill a basic daily necessity for people, that of the need to eat.  And more importantly, I can give them a cheerful smile, a friendly "Hey, how are you?  What can I get you?" and a wholesome sandwich to eat.  :)

I firmly believe that as believers we can share the love of Christ simply by being kind, friendly and cheerful to those around us, even when they aren't kind, friendly or cheerful.  I have some coworkers that are sometimes hard to get along with.  But that doesn't change how I act toward them.  I am so filled with the love and joy of Jesus that it just spills out onto those around me.  I try hard to be encouraging and cheerful, because it makes other people happy when I do.  Joy is contagious: I want to spread it! :)

I'm tired, now, but it's that good weariness that comes after working hard. Granted, I worked for, what, four hours and fifteen minutes?  But it's the longest stretch of being on my feet that I've had all summer!!  I've been plenty busy at home, but dishes and toilet-scrubbing aren't exactly strenuous jobs. :)

God has given me work, for which I am thankful.  Now I just want to serve Him as best I can in the jobs and vocations he's given me.  I'm so glad that wife and homemaker are at the top of the list of those vocations!!

Today :)

Sleeping in
Hubby making breakfast
Blackberry jam--on pancakes, on toast, on biscuits...
Lunch with the grandparents
Girlfriend chats
Love in all its forms
Sunshine
Cool breezes
Browsing a sweet little shop across the street (that I didn't even know about till today!)
Brothers and brownies and friends
Homemade biscuits.  YUM.
Girl movies
Tea
Laughter
Cute couples
Happiness!!!

Good Things

Good: full fridge, full cupboards, overflowing pantry shelves.

Good: sunshine without, air conditioning within.

Good: financial stuff for school figured out and taken care of.

Good: the weight lifted off our shoulders as a result of financial stuff figured out!

Good: the promise of new windows within the next month.  (No more leaks!!)

Good: homemade banana bread, still so yummy.

Good: textbooks costing much less than I expected.

Good: money in the bank.

Good: time with family this weekend.

Good: my amazing, sweet, romantic husband.

Good: GOD!!!

I'm Loved: Clean House or Not

My family is coming to visit on Sunday!  They're staying with my grandparents (unfortunately we don't have room for four more people) but Hubby and I will spend as much time as possible with them while they're here.  I can hardly wait!!  It's only been about six weeks since I saw them last, and I know the next time gap will be much longer--either till Thanksgiving or Christmas.  But this will be the first time my parents and siblings will see our apartment.  I have a list on the fridge of what cleaning I want to do before they arrive (and, gulp, I only have three days to finish it!).  I really want my mother, especially, to see that I'm a capable housekeeper and can keep a house clean!  (Mom, if you read this, yes, this is what's going through my mind.)

The house needs cleaning anyway: picking up, dusting vacuuming, etc.  The bathroom got cleaned yesterday; it's always so nice to have a clean bathroom!  This morning I want to get the living room tidied up, dusted and vacuumed.  It really shouldn't take long.  :)

It's not that I'm trying to impress my family...well, I am, to be honest.  And I like having a clean house, so that's a benefit for Hubby and me, too.  But I know I don't have to have a sparkling house to impress my family.  They know I can be messy.  They know I'm not perfect.  They love me anyway, and I know they would whether my house was clean or a disaster!

God is like that.  He looks into our lives and sees the best and the very worst of us.  I sometimes wonder what I'll be doing when Christ returns.  I hope I'll be doing something that's pleasing to him.  But I can't impress God.  He knows how sinful I can be; how disobedient I am to him sometimes (often), how unperfect I am.  But he loves me anyway, whether I'm "good" or not!  The truth is, when God looks at me, he doesn't see sinful, flawed me.  He sees the righteousness of Jesus, which covers me because of Jesus' sacrifice on the cross and his glorious resurrection.  He sees the sinless, perfect glory of his Son, even as he knows that I'm a sinner.  He sees the me whom he has forgiven, and continues to forgive daily.

When my parents arrive, they won't care about dust and crumbs on the furniture and floors; they love me because I'm me, not because I can do everything right.  Now, that doesn't mean I shouldn't strive to have a clean house, and to have everything in order!  Just because God loves and forgives us unconditionally doesn't mean we can do whatever we want regardless of whether it's pleasing to God or not.  We obey, love, serve and honor him simply because he is God.  And I want to love, serve and honor my family because they are my family!

So, with that encouragement in mind, I'm going to start getting things done around here!! :)

Dressing for My Husband

A friend just posted this on her facebook wall:

Girls do not dress for boys. They dress for themselves and of course, each other. If girls dressed for boys they'd just walk around naked at all times.




I was about to disagree with her, but on second thought (and especially since I'm married) she's right! :D  I'm not trying to be dirty, I promise...just honest.


Since going around au natural isn't generally an option for me, I do try to dress in a way that makes my husband smile.  This is a relatively new thing for me.  Before having a husband (or fiance, or boyfriend) I liked to look cute, but what I wore wasn't a big deal.  I rarely wore makeup (still don't wear much).


However, once I had a man in my life, and once I realized how men are such visual creatures, I started paying more attention to the way I dressed.In my dresser are a lot of t-shirts, you know, those screen-print tees that I got from camp, or youth trips, etc.  None of them are very flattering, so if it weren't for the memories attached, I would probably just get rid of them entirely.


Since being married I've been learning how to love my husband more, and dressing in a way that makes him smile is one of those ways.  Now, that doesn't always mean short shorts and cleavage-baring shirts, although sometimes when it's just us at home I love doing that for him!  It's really nice to have that freedom.  Most of the time, though I wear my usual modest--but nice--clothes.  And I've started making it a big priority to be all put together by the time Hubby comes home for lunch.  That means dressed, teeth brushed, hair done, makeup on, and smelling nice (he loves my Midnight Amethyst from Bath and Body Works--yep, that's as high-end as I get! :D ).


This is one really easy way I can show my husband I love him.  I might still be in my bathrobe with messy hair when he leaves for work, but by the time he gets home I like looking pretty.  Now, don't get me wrong, Hubby loves me no matter how I look, and he's said so more than once!  But looking nice makes me feel good as well as making him smile.  And if there's one thing I love doing more than almost anything, it's making my husband smile.  :)

Another very good reason to dress nicely for my husband is that it's a God-honoring thing to do!  I made a vow to God, my husband, and those who witnessed it to love, honor, cherish and respect my husband (among other things).  That includes pleasing my husband by dressing beautifully.  It's also taking care of my body, which, since the Holy Spirit lives in me, is God's temple.

It makes God smile when I make my husband smile, because by loving Hubby, I'm loving the God who made both of us and who gave us to each other.  One lovely benefit of marriage is the mutual pleasure and joy of both the husband and the wife.  That is one way God blesses his children through marriage: he gives people to each other to increase their joy!  Any way I can increase my husband's joy, whether a little or a lot, is pleasing and honoring to the God who brought us together.