The focus of my life: Me or God?

Too often I find myself looking at life from a "me-focused" perspective:
"What should I do?"
"What can I do?"
"What should I not have done?"

This tends to make me frustrated and worried, because it's a law-based perspective. I'm constantly putting myself down from not living up to my own expectations.

Obviously, living with this perspective is not the way to be content and joyful in life. Rather, I need to keep my focus on Christ:
What has he done for me?
What is he doing in my life right now?
What has he promised for my future?


In terms of my eternal state ("What has God promised for my future?"), that's something for which I fully rely on God, not on myself. I have been made of a child of God by his grace and saved through faith in his Son, Jesus Christ, which is a gift of God. My eternal salvation is not in question, and it is secure in Christ.

It's the day-to-day life that's a struggle, not my hope for the future. Satan tries to tear me (all of us) down: "You're such a terrible person. You never get anything right. God is so disappointed in you."

To counter this, we get to live in the knowledge that we are forgiven. God gladly and willingly forgives all our mistakes--even the ones we might think are unforgivable--and helps us turn away from our sins, repent, and turn back to him.

When I feel like I'm a "terrible person" or a "bad Christian," I remind myself that God sometimes works in and through me despite me! The Holy Spirit, living within us, enables us to live a life that's obedient to God and that reflects his love to those around us.

The ability to live a "good Christian life" is not something we find within ourselves. It's something God gives us freely, as a father gives good gifts to his children.

We cannot trust our feelings in this. Whether I "feel" like I'm a terrible person or not, that doesn't change what God has done for me. Our forgiveness is not based on our feelings. Neither is our salvation. We are saved and forgiven because of God's great love for us, shown in Christ's death and resurrection.

This is what I want to be the focus of my life!

Not me. Not my actions.

God--and his great love for me.

Alone but Not Lonely

I'm linking up today at The Gypsy Mama for 5-minute Friday. It's been a while since I did this, and I like having the writing prompt--saves me having to decide what to write on! And it's lovely to visit the others in the link-up and see how they interpret the prompt.

Hop over and visit others' blogs, and maybe write a five-minute post of your own?

What to do:

1. Write for 5 minutes flat for pure unedited love of the written word. 2. Link back and invite others to join in. 3. Go and comment on the post of the person who linked up before you. This is the one rule of this community.





Today's prompt: lonely.

I could be lonely right now.
I'm home alone, in a house that's quiet except for the ticking clock and the sound of cars going by outside.
But I'm not really "lonely". I think of lonely as a negative thing--alone, and not wanting to be. Sometimes we want to be alone. Even I like being alone sometimes, and I'm an extravert.

But I'm not lonely.
Sometimes I kind of feel lonely, even when I'm not by myself--missing my mom and dad and siblings (I still haven't fully gotten used to living eleven hours away from them). Missing my friends--all my closest friends live far away from me now, and I hardly ever see them.

Missing family and friends or not, I always have the comfort of my husband. With him, I'm never lonely. He's the best of both worlds: my closest family, and my dearest friend.

And more than that, I have Jesus. I know, there's no physical presence there--I can't reach out and touch him. But I know that the Holy Spirit lives in my heart, and I know that God is everywhere, all the time, so I'm never, ever truly lonely.

But there are so many people who don't know the amazing presence of a God who loves them, who desires to be always near them. I think it's those people who are truly lonely. And what's sad is, they don't even know what they're missing. That "God-shaped vacuum" C.S. Lewis talked about--they have it, and don't necessarily even know it.

I'm thankful that, although I may be alone, I'm not ever truly lonely.

a witness, right where I am.

On Sunday we heard two missionaries speak--a young couple who graduated from the same college my husband and I attend.  They're leaving soon to spend two years in China, but they were talking about how the main mission field for any person is their own home--their neighborhood--their town.

Each of us has been called to live our faith--to be a witness for Christ-- right where we are, no matter where that is.

I've heard this before, of course, but I've been thinking more about it today.  In my semi-isolated life--mostly surrounded by fellow Christians- how do I live this out?

I simply live as a Christian. The Holy Spirit lives in me, so he is working in my life and in the lives of those I see every day, even if I'm not specifically "preaching." I am called to live a life obedient to Christ--a life that reflects the love that he has for me.

How does this play out practically in my life? Well, because the Holy Spirit lives in my heart, I have the ability--by his grace--to exhibit the "fruits of the Spirit" in my life: love. joy. peace. patience. kindness. goodness. faithfulness. gentleness. self-control.

In producing these fruits, I live my faith, I witness Christ in my life. Those qualities are only produced by a person transformed by the love and grace of Christ--a person whose faith rests in Christ alone. Without Christ, any good thing I would do would be worthless. Because I am his child, I am a tool in his hands to bless the lives of those around me.

I can encourage others. I can contribute joy to their lives. I can be kind and patient to the person who frustrates or annoys me. I can use my time well, exhibiting self-control in my actions. I can cultivate a gentle, quiet, peaceful spirit...

all thanks to the Holy Spirit's power in my life.


How do you live your faith, right where you are?

Theology: What I believe about God

The subject of God fills books.  There are way too many different false gods in this world, but I believe in the only true God: the God of the Christian Bible.  The Bible is all about God: who he is, what he has done, and how much he loves us.  What are the most important things about God?  That's what I'd like to cover in this post.

I believe in God not because of anything I can do, but because he has given me faith to believe in him.

He created the universe and everything in it, including all people, which gives every person inherent worth as a creation of God.

He is all-powerful, all-knowing, and everywhere at the same time.

He is three Persons in one God.  I can't explain how this is, but I know it by faith.  God is Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.  God the Son is Jesus Christ, who is God incarnate--man and God, both at the same time, neither more or less of the other.  As man, he was able to die on the cross; as God, he lived a sinless life, and therefore his death counted for the sins of all people-- and he didn't stay dead!  He rose from the dead, ascended into heaven, and will return someday to bring all those who believe in him to live with him in heaven for eternity.

God the Holy Spirit came into my heart at my baptism, and it is he who gives me faith.  The Holy Spirit gives me the ability to live a life that is obedient to God; without the gift of faith no good works I do are good at all.  But no works do anything to help me earn salvation.  In fact, I cannot do anything at all to "earn" salvation.  It is a gift.

Because he loves me, God has saved me from sin, death, and the power of Satan.  He has given this gift freely, without expecting anything from me.  He gives me faith to believe in him, and as a result of believing in God and what Jesus has done for me, I am forgiven of all the bad things I do, and I am reconciled to God, and can look forward to eternity with him in heaven--all because of his grace to me.

Now, it is possible to reject the gifts of faith, salvation and eternal life.  Many people have chosen to do so, and they will have to endure the consequences of that choice.  But God freely offers the gift of faith to all people.

It's important to remember that we can't fully understand everything about God.  If we could understand him completely, he wouldn't be God!  Our minds are finite, and as humans we simply don't have the mental capacity to understand the enormity that is God.  We can understand aspects of who he is and what he does, but it is not for us to understand him fully.  That's okay.  That's why he gives us faith, because he knows we don't have the capacity for complete understanding.  We just accept the things we can't understand by faith.

The fact that I believe in and trust in God doesn't mean I don't have questions.  I struggle with why God allows so many horrible things to happen in the world.  I don't know why he does.  But I do know this:  God has a plan for all of humanity that is WAY bigger than I can comprehend.  I know that I fit into that plan, and I know what the outcome will be for me and all believers: HEAVEN. :)  What happens between now and then is not for me to know.  That's God's business.  I know that he's completely good, and that he has a good and perfect plan.  I trust that by faith, and leave the rest up to him.


I could write so much more about who God is to me personally, and what he's done in just my life.  It's amazing that such a big God would pay so much attention to, and heap so much love on, just me.  But he does.  And he's amazing. :)

I guess the most important thing about this awesome God of mine is that he loves you.  He loves me.  He loves all of humanity, far more than we could ever imagine.  In fact, the Bible says that God IS love.

Just trust that.


Linking with: Upward Not Inward, Deep Roots at Home, Raising Homemakers, We are THAT Family, A Wise Woman Builds Her Home

I am a sinner and a saint.

If we're all about the "I" today, I'd like to talk about what I am.

I am a sinner.  Born into sin, because of the sin of Adam and Eve that has been passed down to me through all those generations.  And I live in sin, because of the sinful choices I make every day.  We live in a sin-filled world, and that's just reality.

But I'm also a saint.  No, that doesn't mean I'm perfect.  I am a child of God.  In my baptism, the Holy Spirit came into my heart and gave me faith.

God lives in me.

That's an amazing thing.  As a result of this, my soul belongs to God and lives in harmony with him.  That's the saint-side of me.

It's hard to understand, I know.  I don't fully understand it myself.  But I know it's true.

Just as every minute of every day I am sinning--doing things in opposition to God--so also, every minute of every day, I am living a life that is obedient to God and pleasing to him.

How can that be?  How can I, just sitting here, be obeying God?

That's the same question I asked a professor a couple years ago, when we were discussing this in a class.  What he told me I will always remember.
"Well, you're sitting here in class," he said.  "In doing so, you're fulfilling your vocation of student.  You're giving attention and respect to me, as your teacher, someone in authority over you.  You're preparing yourself for whatever future vocation God has planned for you.  You're contributing to the discussion and helping others learn and grow.  So, just by having your rear in that chair right now, you're obeying and honoring God."

I had never thought of it like that before.  Even without meaning to, without doing it intentionally, my whole life is one of obedience to God.  Why?  Because the Holy Spirit lives in me and enables me to wholly serve, love and obey God.

It's not about me.  If it was up to me, I would only be sinning all the time.  It's only because of God's grace, mercy and forgiveness that I am able to be obedient to Him.

That gives me so much joy.  One of the biggest goals of my life is to give honor to my Jesus.  And because of His love for me, I do that all the time!  It's wonderful how He helps me so much in my desire to live in obedience to Him.  He knows that if it wasn't for His help, I'd never be able to do it myself! :D

You know what's wonderful?  If you're a baptized believer in Jesus, you're a sinner and saint, too.  Sure, you'll struggle with sin all the time.  But don't despair--because of Jesus, you are always a saint.  And someday, when our earthly bodies have died, our eternal souls will live forever with Jesus in heaven--in perfection!

When You Don't Feel Beautiful

Physical beauty is pleasant to have.

We all like to have good hair days, clear skin, white (or mostly white) teeth, and flawless makeup, with our clothes fitting just right and flattering our bodies.

However, if you've read 1 Peter, chapter 3, you know that physical beauty isn't everything.

"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes.  Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight." 1 Peter 3:3-4

We all desire that kind of inner beauty.  But what about the times when you feel like you don't have even that kind of beauty?  When "a gentle and quiet spirit" is the last way you would describe your inner self?

Well...
That kind of beauty does not come from you.
It comes from within, yes... but from a source that is not you at all.

"Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God?" 1 Corinthians 6:19

Your inner beauty comes from the Holy Spirit, because as you are a saved and forgiven child of God, the Holy Spirit lives in you.

"For the fruit of the Spirit is love, you, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.  Against such things there is no law.  Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires.  Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit." Galatians 5:22-25

Yes, we sin every day.
But by the grace of God, the Holy Spirit enables us to obey, please and honor God in our words, thoughts and actions--and God forgives us when we do fail.

It is God who makes us beautiful...inside and out.


Linking up with thanks:
Growing Home; Time-Warp Wife; Call Me Blessed; Cornerstone Confessions; Lessons from Ivy

God's Love: Beyond Imagination

 From Lisa-Jo Baker:
1. Write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking.
2. Link back here and invite others to join in.
3. And then absolutely, no ifs, ands or buts about it, you need to visit the person who linked up before you & encourage them in their comments. Seriously. That is, like, the rule. And the fun. And the heart of this community..


So that's what Five-Minute Friday is. :)
Today's prompt: Beyond.


My heart stretches beyond my body, beyond my house, beyond the city and state I live in.
Because I know God's love stretches beyond anything that seeks to restrict it.


I want my love to go as far as his does.
Well, I'm not God, so that probably won't work.  But that's okay.  I might not be able to encompass the entire world with my love, like God does, but that doesn't mean I have to keep it all inside, either.


I can pray.  Prayer is something that goes beyond distance, culture, race, tradition.  It goes beyond the confines of land, crosses oceans, climbs mountains.


And it does that because God's Holy Spirit goes beyond all those things, too.  By the power of the Holy Spirit living in me, I can pray for those whom I will never meet.  My love can go great distances through my prayers... because then, my love will be God's love going out to those for whom I pray.  When he hears my prayers--and he will, he always does--he will send his Spirit to be with those people.  Most of whom I don't even know, and probably never will.


And then my love will be instead God's love.  Which is the best kind of all.


And instead of my imperfect, sinful, often selfish and misguided human love,
it will be God's all-perfect love
going beyond imagination
beyond human boundaries
beyond what I in my prayers can even ask for.




Linking up today...
Your Thriving Family; Consider the Lilies; finding joy

Always Sinner...and ALWAYS Saint.

I've heard it twice in two days now.
See God in everything.
See Him in me, always.


My Christian doctrine teacher says that we Lutherans focus too much on our sinful natures.  But my husband whispered over to me, "Simul justus et peecator."  Simultaneously saint and sinner.  That's what we are.  But we, at least I, tend to focus so much more on the sinner, and discount the saint.

Today I read Ann's words in One Thousand Gifts, "Why do I reduce The Greatest to the lesser instead of seeing the lesser, this mess, as reflecting The Greatest?  I have to learn how to see, to look through to the Largeness behind all the smallness."

Even in my own sinfulness, I can see Christ.  Moreover, the new person in me--the sanctified, justified saint--is here ALL THE TIME.  Yes, the sinner is here all the time too.  But I am always holy.

My professor explained it this way.  "You don't always think about loving your husband, do you?  Love is often an unconscious decision.  You don't always think about serving God, either.  Are you serving God by being in class right now?"  I replied that yes, I guessed so.  "You are.  You might not realize it; you might not even be doing it intentionally.  But you are here to learn about the faith in order to be able to teach it better in your future ministry.  Your being here, respecting your teacher and your classmates, is following God's will.  You are being led by the Holy Spirit and you are being obedient to God just by being here."

That got me wondering how often I really am obeying God without realizing it!!  Is that not the epitome of grace: that he allows us to obey him without our knowledge, even as we so often sin without consciously deciding to.  Doing dishes is being obedient to God.  Bathing is being obedient to God.  Grocery shopping...doing homework...folding laundry...even sleeping!  All of these things are fulfilling God's will for me in one way or another.

So very often I am hard on myself for sinning so much.  But do I thank God that, by his grace, I am able to obey him so much?  I think we as Christians either give ourselves too much or too little credit.  We do sin much, yes.  But we do good things for God as well.

Most importantly:  we believe in God all the time.  Yes, faith is a gift, so we did not consciously choose to receive it.  But we don't have to consciously work to believe, either.  Believing in God makes us saints: his children, his chosen ones.  Since we believe all the time, we are saints, all the time.  


I have the power of the Holy Spirit living in me.


That never changes.

And just imagine...when we join Christ in heaven one day, we will lose the sinful side of ourselves, and be only saints.  Only holy.  Always obedient to Christ.

Can you just imagine how wonderful that will be?

God speaks to me!

The realization of this hits me every now and then.

I have the very words of God, THE God, the only God, the One who created the entire universe including me... I have his words in a book in my lap.

How crazily incredible IS that?!?!?
And it's all about how he loved the world SO much that he sent his Son Jesus to save the entire world from their sins.  And that whoever believes that can spend eternity with God in heaven.  That's the whole story of the Bible--salvation.  It's amazing!!

Today's Joy Dare is to find "3 blessings from God's Word."
Well.  That's not too hard! :)

In my Christian Doctrine (specifically Lutheran doctrine) class this morning we were talking about the Holy Spirit.  Several passages from John were particularly wonderful:

"And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Counselor--to be with you forever--the Spirit of truth.  The world cannot accept him because it neither sees him nor knows him.  But you know him, for he lives with you and will be in you." John 14:16-17
I find so much comfort in this.  Jesus was preparing his disciples for his death and eventual ascension into heaven, which meant he no longer would be physically with them.  But Jesus promised to send the Holy Spirit--the Counselor, the Comforter, the Spirit of Truth.  And that same Spirit lives in and with me.


Another passage from the same chapter (it's a discourse that includes quite a lot on the Holy Spirit) is verse 27: "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you.  I do not give to you as the world gives.  Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid."
Oh, I worry and fear so much.  I let Satan take away the peace that God longs to fill me with.  I worry about the future, about finances, about health, about so many things...but God has that all under control.  He doesn't want me to worry about it because I don't have to.  Instead, he wants to give me his peace.  Such grace!

A Bible verse that came to mind today is actually from Esther.  Her cousin Mordecai told her of a plot that a Persian official had against the Jews, Esther's people.  Esther had been made the Queen of Persia, Xerxes' wife, and she was the only one who could interfere in order to save her people.  Mordecai said to her, "Who knows but that you have come to royal position for such a time as this?" (Esther 4:14b).  I'm not in royal position, but I think God puts us in certain places for very specific reasons.  Not all the time, perhaps, but certainly some times.  Today I realized one reason he had me sit beside someone in a class last year.  This girl and I have become very good friends, and we understood today one extremely important reason why God brought us together: he knew we would really need each other, and that we could be a mutual comfort, encouragement and support to one another.

God's Word is SUCH a blessing...and those are some of the ways he blessed me with his Word today.

Linking up with Women Living Well and  Deep Roots at Home

comforts of home

As I write there is oatmeal bread in the oven, just about done, and vegetable-beef soup on the stove (I didn't realize how long of a project that is, but oh it's going to be worth it!).  Joshua and I have been lounging in pajama pants and t-shirts since we got home from church.  It's been a wonderful, relaxing, couple-bonding day.  And I got to do some cleaning and cooking, so I'm pretty happy. :)

It's amazing how my emotions rise and fall, how days and weeks can have such a combination of bad and good. Whoever first compared life to a roller coaster sure had it right.

That's just how it is here on earth, I suppose.  The good parts more than make up for the bad.  God is gracious, even though we're living in a world of sin.  He lets us experience little glimpses of his glory, his goodness, and the perfection that he is preparing for us in heaven.  So many good gifts fill every single day, more than I can count, and far more than I ever thank God properly for.  And yet he keeps them coming.

This marriage-thing is wonderful: on the days when I'm sad or upset or frustrated, Joshua is there to help ease them.  On the days when I'm being a snotty little brat (because I sure can be!), he is there to put me in my place and help make me aware of my sinfulness.  And on the days when I'm happy, content, and joyful, he shares in those things and makes them all the more sweet.

Today I'm reveling in these comforts:
comfy clothes
comfort food
a warm home
a calm, relaxed mind
the gentle presence of my husband
the peaceful presence of the Holy Spirit.

It's a good day today.

Peacefulness and Thankfulness

All I hear is the gentle ticking of the clock.  It's a constant reminder of the one in my parents' living room: if I were to close my eyes, I could imagine myself there.

It's almost completely silent besides the clock this morning.  9:30 on a Sunday, I'm up, my husband is still asleep on the other side of the wall.  Curiously, I notice that I'm filled with an inner peace.  I've felt it before, but not for a while, or at least I haven't been aware of it for some time.  There's no worrying, no frustration, no distress.


Thank you God.

I'm content with my life, with who I am, with the way things are.  The silence makes me peaceful, too.  I know there are dishes in the sink and church clothes to decide on, but that's okay.  There's no rush this morning.

It's nice, this feeling that everything is all right with the world.  I don't always feel this way.  Sometimes the worry takes over, my imagination running wild with "what if"s.  And I destroy my own inner peace.  I know why.  It's because I try to figure everything out for myself, by myself.  I don't always have to understand the why's or how's.  This contentment that I feel?  It's a "peace that surpasses understanding."  The Holy Spirit doesn't think like I do.  He doesn't let worry get in his way.  He has the ability to snuff anxiety out like a tiny candle, and replace it with this gentle, comfortable, relaxing feeling--my breathing is even and slow, my features are relaxed, my stomach is knot-less, and no unhappy thought is filling my head.

This is what happens when I let God take control of my life.  Trying to do it myself never really works.  God's much better at handling my life than I am.  If only I could remember that all the time: give in to this sweet surrender, let Him take care of everything, every day.

Every morning could feel like this, with the Spirit filling my home and my heart.

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." -Philippians 4:6-7

"Your beauty...should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth to God." -1 Peter 3:3a & 4