Planning for ministry. This is exciting.

My friends, I want to share something with you.  Something about which I'm starting to get really excited.

First, a little background--Joshua and I will be here in our little college town for a while.  We've spread out our college classes in order to stay sane, so it's taking us longer than typical to finish.  What this means is we can stay comfy; we're not leaving anytime soon.

I experienced the blessing of having several older girls who reached out to me my freshman and sophomore years, who were there when I needed advice or just to talk, and were spiritual mentors to me.  I want to be able to do that for other girls--to be a blessing as I have been blessed.

So I decided that this fall I'm going to seek to start a small ministry to college girls here in our home.

Image credit: Ambro via freedigitalphotos.net

I've been thinking and praying about this for some time now, and I feel a peace about it, although the idea fills me with--not worry, not anxiety, but a positive kind of stress.  It'll be a big job, and a big responsibility, and a pretty big commitment.  Joshua's willing that I open our home one night a week to whatever girls want to come.  I don't have a clear idea yet of what this will look like, exactly--I don't want it to be too structured, but I do want to have regular components of fellowship, a simple Bible study, and prayer.  I want our home to be a place where young women feel welcome and comfortable, and most importantly, where the Holy Spirit is very obviously present.  My primary goal for this is to let young women know that they are beautiful, treasured daughters of the King of kings--that Jesus loves them more than anything they could imagine.

I'll let you know as my plans for this fill out.  I'm starting now to pray that God leads me to seek out the girls he wants to be a part of this, and that above all, His will will be accomplished.  In the meantime, could you be praying for me?  Praying that the Gospel will be proclaimed?  That the young women who need this kind of fellowship will be led to it?  That I will honor God in everything?

And practically speaking, could you be helping me think of a name for this group?  I'm thinking something like "Faith Fellowship Sisters,"  But better.

I am so very excited about this, dear readers!  I can't wait to see what God is going to do with me.

apparently I'm growing up...

So I discovered proof of something recently: I'm growing up.

How do I know?  Several things:

Joshua and I spent over an hour working on our budget this evening.  It was fun.

My goals for this weekend are: get the kitchen clean, and get the bathroom clean.

I'm looking forward to composing a grocery list and a detailed, two-week meal plan tomorrow.

I'd rather watch The Dick van Dyke show than any TV show made in the last 40 years.

A clean kitchen is a joy to my heart.

I would rather sleep than do a lot of other things.  (Although I realize this is also true for infants and the elderly, so maybe this isn't so much a sign of growing up as it is of simply being human.)

My bedtime is 10 pm.  Even on weekends.

On a similar note, sleeping in means sleeping till 9 am at the latest.  Bliss!

Junk food equals homemade pizza and brownies.  (Thank goodness.)

I would rather eat oatmeal with flax seed for breakfast than sugary cold cereal (yuck).


And yet, I'm still a 21-year-old college student.
But I'm also married, so maybe that's an explanation for why I feel so weirdly adult.

I realize, of course, that I still have a lot of growing up to do.  I haven't had much life experience in comparison to my grandparents, or even my parents.  There are so many things left for me to learn and experience.

But let me tell you, for someone whose peers are all still living on a college campus and whose biggest worries are test scores and what mystery food will be served in the cafeteria, it is weird to state all those truths I listed above.  I feel... unusual.  Isolated.  Often misunderstood.

That's why I'm so thankful for the few married, close-to-my-age friends that I do have.  Because they understand, and it's so good to have friends who understand.  Who get me, who can sympathize, and who know how exciting it is to have a grocery budget over $50 a week.  (Not kidding.  That's about what I feed us on, and I am so proud of myself.)

This Thursday, and every day, I am thankful for the life God has given me: the good and the bad, because I learn more from mistakes than I do from successes, and I trust God more in hard times than in easy.  I'm so very thankful for a husband who loves me even when I'm an idiot, for friends who accept me exactly as I am, for family who are always there when I need them.

Because there's one more reason I've realized that I'm growing up:

I have come to learn that the greatest blessings in life are those that can't be assigned a monetary value.  Not things that can be purchased.  Blessings that are tangible, but absolutely priceless: family.  Friends.  Faith.  Forgiveness.

No matter how grown-up I get, I hope to always remember that.

Linking up today (for the first time in so long...so grateful!):
black tag diaries, Jenni Mullinix, lovely little whimsy, kate says stuff, First Day of My Life, Passionate and Creative Homemaking

to keep on keepin' on

Today was the first day of school.
Technically, it's my senior year, but I have a year and a half to go and Joshua has two.  So we'll be "super-seniors," which isn't that big a deal...a lot of people follow the five-year plan.  Or four and a half, in my case.

We didn't get to bed nearly early enough last night, so that might contribute to my tiredness.  I'm exhausted.  It'll probably take a few days to get used to the school schedule again.  I don't have a massively busy schedule, but it's plenty.  Figuring in classes, work, homework, meal-making, cleaning, dishes, and time with friends and most importantly with Joshua...it's a little overwhelming.  But I know we'll get into a system, and I'll get used to it.  I always do. :)

So far I've only been to three of my eight classes.  Two of them are choir and handbells, which both are very familiar.  I have two new professors this semester, and I met both of them today.  I think this will be a good semester.  I'm looking forward to all my classes.  They will all be useful and interesting. :)

I want to keep blogging, and linking up, but I have a feeling that, at least for a while, blogging might have to take the back burner.  I know writing is really, really important, but did you see that list of everything I have to do every day?

Give me a couple weeks.  At the most, a month.  I'll keep writing as much as I can...but it might be a little less than usual in the next few weeks.  Bear with me.  Stick with me if you want to.  Keep your eyes open... I'll keep posting.  I'll be here.  I just might be a little scarce for a while. :)

Because this is important to me.  Writing.  Blogging.  Keeping up with this community.  I know I have an obligation to my readers, to keep on keepin' on.  I have even more of an obligation to myself.  This is important.

But I talk a lot about priorities...keeping first things first.  Blogging is an important thing, but it's not a first thing.  Not right now.  So it will happen--I hope fairly regularly--but I need to keep other things first: God.  My husband.  My friends.  School.  Work.

Thanks for sticking with me. :)

Of school and cooler weather...blessings abound

The seasons are changing...schedules are changing...routines will change.  It's that time of year, and it gives me so much to thank and praise God for!  It's good to be thankful...but it's essential to know to Who those thanks and praises go.  I am thankful to God my Father, my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, for all the blessings He gives me every day, and in this new season of school and cooler weather.

Today's post is really late...but I am so thankful for that because it means that today is the first day of our four-day weekend. :)  Joshua has two extra days off between his summer job, and school starting on Monday.

I am thankful for cooler weather!  We've had the windows open every night.  It's so wonderful.  I'm very ready for fall!

I am thankful that my friends are coming back to campus this weekend!  It's been a quiet summer...I'm so excited to see some very special people.

I'm so thankful for work.  I LOVE the people whose houses I clean.  I enjoy working catering at school.  And I'm so excited to get back to working at the library on Monday!!!

I'm thankful for financial blessings.  The bill for our schoolbooks this year was terrifying, but thanks to financial aid it's all covered!  We were even able to help out my brother-in-law with buying books for his freshman year.

I'm thankful for family!  In the last week my parents have celebrated their anniversary and both their birthdays, and my brother's birthday is tomorrow.  Plus we spent last weekend at Joshua's parents.  Our family is amazing.  I love them so much. <3

I am so thankful for the school we go to.  We have amazing professors, and it's such a blessing to be on a Christian campus.  I get to go to chapel every day this semester, and I am looking forward to that so much.  I'm also in three classes with Joshua and three with my best girlfriend, and that is an incredible blessing!

I am thankful that I get to be in "advance" hand bells, and choir, this semester.  I love music, I love the directors, and I can't wait to be involved in our annual Christmas concert in December.  It's also one of my favorite ways to praise Jesus--through music!

I love all the new things that come with this new season.  It's a reminder of how good and great our God really is!!


Linking up to these lovely ladies:
black tag diaries; The Fontenot Four; Kate Says Stuff; First Day of My Life; Lovely Little Whimsy; Passionate and Creative Homemaking

Strength Renewed

It's getting toward the end of the summer.  Many students and families are starting a new school year.  Joshua and I have less than two weeks until school begins again for us.

I'm ready for a new schedule, a change of pace, a different routine.  This summer has been wonderful, don't get me wrong--but I'm ready for some changes.

At the same time, I'm a little apprehensive.  With the new school year will come new challenges: juggling being a wife and homemaker with being a full-time student and working part-time and trying to spend some time with friends, too.  It's a bit overwhelming!  (If you're feeling like you have a lot on your plate--you are not alone!)

A verse from Isaiah came to mind this morning.  God said to Isaiah,

"I said, 'You are my servant'; I have chosen you and have not rejected you.  So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God.  I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." -Isaiah 41:9b-10

God has chosen me to serve him.  He is always with me; he gives me strength and help.  I have nothing to fear or worry about.  And neither do you, no matter what your life looks like right now!

In the previous chapter of Isaiah, God spoke more comforting words:

"Do you not know?  Have you not heard?  The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth.  He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.  He gives strength to the weary, and increases the power of the weak.  Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall.  But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."  -Isaiah 41:28-31

Our strength does not come from ourselves.  Even youth (like me!) grow tired and weary.  But God never does.  Our God is everlasting--Creator of all that exists.  It is when we put our hope in him, not in our own "strength," that we become strong.  It is God who lifts us up.

I won't get through this coming school year on my own power.  It will be with the strength of God, by his grace and his will, that I will live each day to his glory.  I won't do that perfectly... but I can trust that God has forgiven me.  And he chose me to be his servant knowing that I'm imperfect, so I know he can and will use me for his will despite my imperfections.

I can't wait to see where his strength will take me this year... to what new heights I'll soar.  I wonder...where will God take you?

Linking up with these lovely ladies:
 Growing Home; Thankful Homemaker; Time-Warp Wife; Cornerstone Confessions; Lessons from Ivy

 

Loved By God, Just the Way I Am

I've come to a place where I can accept, and like, the person I am.  I'm not exactly satisfied with that person, but maybe I'm not supposed to be.  There's always learning, growing, becoming to do.  God still has a lot to teach me, so "who I am" will never be completely finished.  I'm not a static being.  I don't like the word "evolving" (for the evolutionary connotations) but that's a fairly apt description for how I'm changing.

Part of the reason that we're not supposed to be quite comfortable in the skin we're in is that there's something more coming, something better--a glorified body.  One that's sinless.  Flawless.  Perfect.

That's a weird concept...to think of myself as perfect.  Because I am so not.  I beat myself up a lot--figuratively, of course--about my imperfections.  The list is long: selfishness, thoughtlessness, faithlessness, worry, discontent. I could go on.  But I've come to terms with the fact that I'm going to stay sinful, and there's no use fretting about it.

That is NOT to say I shouldn't try not to sin!  There are a lot of bad habits I could and should work on breaking.  There are so many things I have yet to learn.

But God won't love me any more, if and when I try to become a better person, than he does right now.  He can, will, and does use even my worst faults for his own purposes.  He gives me jobs to do for his kingdom. He loves me unconditionally, and forgives me constantly.  I'm beautiful and holy in his eyes--so who am I to put myself (or others) down?  We're all worth more than that.  We're priceless: creations of the God of the universe.

That's another huge concept to try to wrap my mind around, but when it comes down to it, that is what is most humbling and most encouraging to me.
The GOD
of the universe
loves/made/forgives/redeemed
      ME.

Sounds insane. It should be.  But it's true.  And that's what gives me hope, purpose, joy, life!  Being a child of God is the greatest blessing in life.  I'm more thankful for this than anything else.

Compared to him, my flaws are pretty minor.  They're not to big for him to handle.  They do't get in the way of his love for me.  And-
Nothing.
Ever.
Will.

Living Intentionally

I've been thinking about something, and I'm just going to type and see what happens.

I know that God places at times and places in our lives for a reason, or at the very least, he works in our lives to accomplish his purposes even if/when things we do are contrary to his will for us.

I don't have a (paying) job yet--I've been keeping busy at home, and I have plenty of things to do to fill my days.  But it's been frustrating, not being able to make money.  I've applied at a couple places, and I know I need to apply elsewhere as well.

But it's been making me wonder, am I using my time well, even though I don't have a job?  Am I using my time to serve others and by doing so serve the Lord?  Am I using extra free time to be in fellowship with him?  Am I living my life intentionally, for a purpose, or am I just 'winging it' and kind of flying by the seat of my pants?

It feels like that sometimes, although the days are settling into a routine of sorts.  I cook.  I clean.  I go shopping for groceries.  I do laundry every week.  I keep the house in order.  But that list looks so pathetic when I actually see it written out.

We had friends over last night.  We're having some young people from our church here tonight, going to a movie and having them here for games and cookies, one other thing I need to do this afternoon (bake).
I try to have the house in order and myself looking nice when my husband comes home from work.
I don't have many friends in town right now, but I'm trying to keep in touch with the ones that are.  We see hubby's family at least once every couple weeks.

So, I'm trying, to have a purpose in life right now, and to glorify God in what I'm doing.  My vocation at this moment is to be a wife and homemaker, and although that might seem like a short list of responsibilities, I'm trying to do my very best at them to be a blessing to my husband first and foremost, and everyone else we come in contact with as well.

I feel like I'm defending myself...to myself.  Which I shouldn't have to.  Maybe I'm just trying to figure out what it is I'm doing and why.  But I know that even the in simplest things that I do to serve others, I'm serving God.  By loving my husband I'm loving our God who made him and who gave us to each other.  Feeding friends is like having Christ at my table.  What a blessing, what an honor it is, to serve God in these vocations he's given me!!!  Thank you Jesus :)

Thankful that Marriage is for LIFE!

As funny as this might sound, I'm really glad I'm only getting married once--for lots of reasons!!  For one thing, I want to spend the rest of my life with my man.  There's no one I'd rather live, love, struggle, rejoice, praise, serve and grow old with.  Also, getting married is a lot of work.  It takes a lot of time, a lot of planning, lots of other people helping, and a lot of money.  I've been having the weirdest dreams of my life related to the wedding.  It is, after all, the biggest decision of my life, the biggest change I'll probably ever go through, the most life-changing event I'll ever experience.

However, I'm thankful for every aspect of this whole experience.  I'm learning more about myself, my future husband, and what all marriage entails.  I'm SO thankful that we have our whole lives to get this marriage-thing down.  It's going to take a lot of work, a lot of patience, a lot of love and forgiveness.  Thank God for his grace, and for the strength we'll need to honor him in our marriage.  I'm so thankful for the man God has given me to "do life" with.  I wouldn't want to go through life without either one of them--God or my man! :)

I'm coming to realize how much so many people love and care about me, about us.  So many of our family and friends are coming, so many are helping in myriad ways.  Our parents have expressed their love to us so clearly.  We are so blessed; God is so good.  And as one of my favorite bloggers, Nikki, reminded me in a recent post, God is not just good in the good times.  We will struggle, but God will be just as good then as he is now, in the happy times.  And we can have joy in those hard times too, because joy is not of ourselves but comes from Him and Him alone.

I have more thoughts, but those of you who are married understand that five days before my wedding, my to-do list is still overwhelming!  I'll get it done...but I need to get it done.  :)

I promised pictures.  They will come...eventually!

Life is Changing

I could make a lot of excuses for why I haven't blogged lately: it's been gorgeous out, I've been busy packing and moving and working and writing papers...all of that is true.  But I haven't been in the Word lately, either--no good excuse for that!

I think I posted recently about all the changes happening in life, but it's really started to hit me.  We moved furniture into our new apartment yesterday, with the help of two friends with pick-up trucks.  The man is moving in this weekend; I'm staying w/ my grandparents here in town till we go to a relative's wedding next weekend, and then I will be back with my parents and sibs.  Then two weeks later I'll be married and moving back here!  As a wife!

It's all happening SO FAST.  As I pack I realize this is the last time I'll have to move out of a dorm room.  Tonight is my last night sleeping in a dorm room, with a roommate who's a girl and who isn't my sister!  She and I will share a room for two precious weeks when I get home, and then I will be a married woman living with my husband.

I can hardly wait.  I know that the transition might be kind of hard to get used to at first, but I'm SO ready to be married and independent!!!

God continues to be absolutely faithful.  I get to work six more days before I leave town and our car is now working with just a new battery.  I'm not nervous about the wedding at all: just excited!

I feel very confidently that God has prepared us in exactly the right way for this new chapter in our lives, both my man's and mine.  He is all-wise, all-loving, and omnicient: no wonder God knows best and does everything for our good! :)

I'd love to write more, but there is still packing and cleaning to be done.  More to come!