I Can Trust Him.

Lately I've been worrying about money (again).

But then, on the phone with my man last night, God reminded me of something.  It's not me who will take care of myself, it's not my future husband who will take care of both of us--it's GOD who will care and provide for us.  And he already has!  In so many ways, God has been continually providing for us. I just need to open up my blind eyes and see those gifts for what they are: God's hand in our lives, taking care of us.

I'm realizing, pretty much daily, that marriage is going to be pretty hard work.  For me to submit to my husband is not going to be easy.  I'm a pretty bossy, selfish person, and I'm going to need some serious lessons in humility along the way.  But that's something else God can provide!!  HE gives us the love we need to give to one another.  HE gives me the strength to be humble and submissive, or in my future husband's case, the strength to lead in love and kindness.  GOD will give us the resources we need to make our marriage work.  That's not to say we won't have to put plenty of blood, sweat and tears into it ourselves.  But we can do ALL THINGS through CHRIST who gives us strength.

Sometimes I think that I have a pretty strong faith, but there are other days that I realize just how much I need to learn.  I don't need to do everything myself; I don't even need to figure out everything myself.

In a book I was reading yesterday (Shepherds Abiding, by Jan Karon), two characters had a discussion about what it means to be a Christian.  A priest told another man a simple prayer, one that included the line "I turn my entire life over to You."  The man commented, "My whole life is a lot to turn over to God."  The priest responded, "A whole life is a lot to handle all by yourself."  I shouldn't expect to be able to do everything myself.  God's given me life, but he also helps me work my way through it.

I can trust God, and I can trust my fiance because he trusts God, too, and I know they both love me more than I can imagine and will take care of me.

Today, I am going to trust.